Tag Archives: Mitt Romney

Potential First Pup Breathes Huge Fucking Sigh of Relief

(Sudbury, MA) At the Duggard Family Dog Kennel, a young Weimaraner puppy named Fritz breathed a huge fucking sigh of relief as Mitt Romney conceded defeat in his attempt to win election as President of the United States. “I know … Continue reading

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“Stop Mitt” – The Presidential Voting Game

We don’t care if you’ve voted for Obama or against Romney. Just vote. And play our game while you watch the results come in. Right Arrow to move right > < Left Arrow to move left Spacebar to fire your … Continue reading

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Romney to NAACP: If Elected, I Will Repeal Obama’s Term in Office

(Houston, TX) Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney was booed during a speech today before the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP). The uproar happened when Romney announced that, if elected, he would not only repeal Obamacare, he would … Continue reading

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Romney Searches for Offshore Money — Swore He Left it Next to Bloomberg’s Cooler

(Bermuda) Presidential candidate Mitt Romney, on vacation in Bermuda from a successful week of fundraising, searched fruitlessly up and down the beach for several hundred million dollars he had stashed away. “Dog-gonnit, I know it was somewhere around here. I … Continue reading

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Republican Solution for Social Security: Stop Young People from Getting Older

(Tampa, FL) Throughout the Republican Presidential debate sponsored by CNN and the Tea Party, the candidates differed on exactly how to save the ailing Social Security system, but they did agree on two points: 1) seniors now in the system … Continue reading

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