Rick Perry promises a bright shining future for an independent Texas.
(West Austin, Texas) Gov. Rick Perry announced his withdrawal from the Republican race for President, but simultaneously announced the forming of a new political party, the Nacho Texaco Party.
| LONG LIVE THE LAND OF OIL AND TASTY SNACKS! | |
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“Let’s face it. Texas has all it needs. We don’t need the United States anymore.”
“We’ve got all the oil we need. We’ve got tasty Mexican snacks. Nachos provide us with the essential food groups: carbohydrates, dairy and uh, uh, well, I forget the last one, but the point is, I will never fail in my duty as leader of the Great Nation of Nacho-Texaco!”
“The first order of business: round-the-clock bed-checks. No same-sex bunking. Except during military service, which will be mandatory for all citizens between the ages of 13 and 75, by the way.”
“No vegetarianism, and all bicycles will be confiscated. Bad for the oil business.”
“For all who don’t agree with us, let’s just say I hope you like desert camping…”
