{"id":751,"date":"2012-01-26T23:48:06","date_gmt":"2012-01-27T04:48:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/?p=751"},"modified":"2012-01-26T23:48:06","modified_gmt":"2012-01-27T04:48:06","slug":"u-s-military-despite-budget-cuts-u-s-will-still-have-biggest-penis-in-the-world","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/2012\/01\/26\/u-s-military-despite-budget-cuts-u-s-will-still-have-biggest-penis-in-the-world\/","title":{"rendered":"U.S. Military: Despite Budget Cuts, U.S. Will Still Have Biggest Penis in the World"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Trident<\/a>

America still has the biggest penis in the world<\/p><\/div>\n

(Washington, D.C.) U.S.Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta outlined a plan to cut the Defense budget by nearly $500 billion dollars.<\/p>\n

\"US<\/a>

"Sure there's going to be shrinkage. That happens with age. But we're the John Holmes of the world."<\/p><\/div>\n

However, Mr. Panetta pointed out that with a combination of existing nuclear missiles, submarines, drones and special forces, the United States will still be “one big-dick-swinging motherfucker.”<\/p>\n

“We might not be the John Holmes of he world….<\/p>\n

\"Porn<\/a>

Our nukes are strategically hidden<\/p><\/div>\n

…but we’ll definitely still be Harry Reems!<\/p>\n

\"Porn<\/a>

"Aaaaaah....It's good to be king of the world!"<\/p><\/div>\n

“We’ll still be able to kick ass anywhere we want to in the world with one hand tied behind our backs”<\/p>\n

\"Arnold<\/a>

The U.S. army needs to go on a diet. And stop thinking with its missile all the time.<\/p><\/div>\n

“Just like Arnold Schwartzenegger, we’ve gotten a little paunchy, but if we drop a few pounds we’ll still be the Terminator.”<\/p>\n

“Unless China continues to get stronger. Then we’re fucked.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(Washington, D.C.) U.S.Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta outlined a plan to cut the Defense budget by nearly $500 billion dollars. However, Mr. Panetta pointed out that with a combination of existing nuclear missiles, submarines, drones and special forces, the United … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,135],"tags":[447,449,448,446,445],"class_list":["post-751","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-political-comedy","category-troutboysblog","tag-arnold-schwartzenegger","tag-harry-reems","tag-john-holmes","tag-leon-panetta","tag-u-s-military"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/751","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=751"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/751\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=751"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=751"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fishandcheese.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=751"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}