Even a six-ton object falling from space could not dent the thick sculls of the Tea Party Representatives
(Washington, D.C.) NASA’s six-ton Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite fell from space today directly on the heads of Tea Party Representatives. As expected, the thickness of their skulls prevented any injury whatsoever.
The satellite must have be a dolt-seeking missile
“We weren’t surprised that Tea Party members’ skulls would be that thick.” Explained Michael Hargrave, Senior Satellite tracking scientist for NASA.
"Hey Hey! Ho Ho! Clean Air Act has got to Go!
“After all, they did just pass the Transparency in Regulatory Analysis of Impacts on the Nation (TRAIN) act. Only a total numbskull would vote for a bill that rolls back the EPA’s ability to protect air quality. We’re estimating the average skull thickness to be approximately for inches, which also explain the size of their puny brains.”
“The good news is that if the Tea Party gets its way, the EPA will be gutted and the air will be so thick that satellites won’t even be able to fall out of the sky.”
“Of course, we’ll all be dead. But it’s good news for cockroaches, I guess.”
