(Washingto, D.C.) Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke admitted today the U.S. was headed for a dreaded “double dip” depression. He predicted that the double-dip recession, although prolonged, would be “divinely delicious and thoroughly satisfying.”
Mmmm...I can't wait for the double-dip recession...
“The Federal Reserve is committed to doing all it can to help in this crisis.” Benanke said at a press conference at Federal Reserve headquarters.
“As a result, every American will receive one French Dip sandwich per year. The sandwich, consisting of moist roast beef on a roll with delicious au jus [beef gravy], will distributed through the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, commonly known as the “Food Stamp” program.
Benanke demonstrates the ideal length of the double-dip recession
Conservatives has criticized this policy as being wasteful.
“This is just another case of the Democrats and the federal government trying to spend their way out of a situation,”
Perry thinks French Dips are for dips
Texas Gov. Rick Perry said on an appearance on Fox News. Â “In my state, most people don’t want or need a French Dip imposed on us by the Federal government. Â And why can’t we have an American Dip for God’s sake?”
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid expressed disagreement in an appearance on MSNBC.
Harry is Hankering for some French-Dip-Edge
“French dips are great. Â I eat them all the time. Â But 1 in 8 Americans are facing hunger every day and we need to do more. Â To stimulate the economy we’re got to first stimulate the American appetite.”
Bye-bye economy, helloooo French Dip!
The Fed chairman closed his statement by adding, “the Federal reserve has allow big banks to dip into our funds without any oversite. Â So why not let Americans dip into a juicy roast beef sandwich?”
“Whether you dunk the whole thing in the sauce or pour the sauce on the top of the sandwich, that’s up to you. Â That’s the beauty of America: Freedom.
